Ok, so what? Am I supposed to learn not to run away.? Face things? Deal with relationships?
Seriously, is that so worth it? Or is it something else?
Why is it so much easier to just leave? Why is that so wrong? What's wrong with saying, you know what? There's about five people in this town in my age group. Nobody gets along with me all that great. I'm in some stupid little box, and maybe I'm judging everyone else. But there's nobody that calls me up and says, "Hey Kris. Let's get coffee and talk for a bit!" Two good friend who seems to enjoy hanging out with me. One's leaving town again.
So there you go. I'm frustrated.
I went to a dance party. And it was fun. But it was a dance party. For, like, a seventeen year old. My littlest brother was there, and he was about as close to the average age as I was!
And it was fun. I had fun. But partway through I was like, Dude! These guys are my younger friends little siblings little siblings. Sometimes four times little siblings!
There are places I want to go. Jobs I want to try. People I would love to see again. Friends I'd love to make.
Ok, so I'm whining. I'm being passive. And I'm leaning on the crutch of saying I tried and it didn't work. So, am I supposed to decide that I'm supposed to be here? And if I am, is it wrong to want to leave?
I have a car. I have a course. I have a family, and I love them lots. I have people who aren't mean to me, despite the impression I may give on here.
But it's just so frustrating. Especially when you didn't plan to be here, and don't want to be.