Wednesday, June 30, 2004

1) I'm through with housitting
2)I'm doing backstage at the summer melodrama
3)I'm through with my housecleaning job
4)I'm convinced that chocolate is good for you
5)I'm tired and need to go to bed

Tuesday, June 29, 2004

I'm scaring myself again. Because tonight I'm realizing that hanging out and goofing off are only really associated with highschool. And that better not be fact because I haven't made enough of it. I'm worried. Do graduates get away with it too? I mean, of course you can always have friends at all walks of life. But I'm getting this feeling that highschool friendships only really take place in highschool. And I know my reasoning doesn't make a lot of sense. But really, when I look at almost all the adults I know they never really seem to just hang out. It's probably offensive to punch your friends past twenty. Yeah, I can hear you laughing, but I'm worried about it. I mean, man, if your really expected to grow up I'm in trouble here. I suspect getting married is part of it, and most the adults I know are married, and I won't be, so maybe I'm safe. But anyway, if it really is true. If I'm really supposed to look at friendship over a cup of coffee from now on, God help me.

Sunday, June 27, 2004

I finally have time to sit down and write a blog post.
It's been pretty hetic since Friday, which is when I had my graduation party. It was great. So much of it was a surprise. Since I've been living out here for the past month my family did most of the organizing and everything. They did a really great job. For a basic run-over, it was kinda formal in dress. If I knew how to upload pictures to the internet I would post one here. I wore a plaid skirt and black lace-up top. (the girl in me was insisting I mention that). We had make-it-yourself taco salad. Then we had somewhat of a program. My family put on a crazy puppet play. I laughed till I cried. I sang (Jennifer Knapp's breathe on me, great song). Cor played the violin accompanied by Rach on piano. A sad attempt at twinkle little star (but you guys, I must admit, I appreciated it). A home movie of many of the clips we had of me. My Dad sung. Short serious bit with diploma, roses, and prayer. Tons of pictures. Lot's of compliments. Peanuts (comic book) napkins. Limbo (which, in all modesty, I won). Neighbor boy on the bagpipes *G*. All in all it pretty much came off exactly the way I was hoping. My mom put together a great scapbook for me, I'm never motivated enough to do my own.
Afterwards I took lots of the girls back here for the night. I think there was ten of us although there was supposed to be fourteen, some couldn't spend the night. I was getting tired but we played the much tried and very true dutch blitz. Talked a bit and then went to bed. Abb and I were in the bed and talked until very late, we were of the impression that everyone was asleep. It wasn't until three that Cor raised her tired voice asking us to be quiet. So we whispered instead *G*. It was getting light when Cor gave up and crawled into bed with us. We did end up getting an hour or two of sleep. We were sprayed with silly string in the morning as we were the only ones still to tired to raise our heads from the pillows.
I really just had a lot of fun.
Sarah (B.) I don't know if you ever read this but I don't know if I properly thanked you for making crepes for breakfast. They were great. I'm still eating the leftovers. We watched t.v. and goofed off some more till I took everyone into town and went to my parents house for supper and to open my gifts. I was so thoughly showered with presents. There was so much stuff that I can tell thought went into. So much stuff I can really use when I get my place. I'm totally grateful.
By time I got home I was tired (go figure), so it was to bed and up early to go to church with Jolah. Hour and half drive there and back. Interesting experience. Neat church, boring picnic. Enough said. Straight to park for usual Sunday games afterwards.
So there, a very informative, boring, and unreflective post. I usually try to avoid these kind but since it was my graduation I'm going to be inconsiderate and do it anyway.
I only want to say, I don't feel any different for being graduated. So please don't ask. But there's that little voice in the back of my head which is trying to speak up louder now. It's another step over with, and when I think about it, It's a pretty big step. I won't be going back to school next fall. I'll never be in highschool again. And, although I don't dwell on it much, it's just some new feelings. That's about the only difference I can think of.
I'm not explaining myself very well. And I'm lacking the will to come up with a way to right now. So that's all I'm going to say. I guess it's something you can't understand unless you experience it.
Thanks to everyone who doesn't read this, but helped make it a success. Thanks to everyone who supports me, prays for me, and showed up. Life wouldn't be right without you guys. I really appreciate it.
And if anyone got through this post, don't you have anything better to do? Love you guys.

Wednesday, June 23, 2004

When I was at work today my brothers and a couple of their friends had a boys day out at my place. Actually, they just wanted to visit my nintendo. Now, they were very responsible. They washed their glasses, and didn't even touch the icecream although I told them to help themselves. If I were them I think I would've dived in with two spoons. But it's weird. I got here and the key was about an inch off from where I leave it. For a split second I thought I'd have to try break in. I never could pick locks. I got in and there was a glass of water on the shelf. I started thinking, heck, I don't even remember using that glass. It took me a few minutes to find the remotes. and when I went to use the washroom the toilet seat was up. Normal stuff when you live in a family of seven, but I'm used to knowing what everything should look like and where everything should be around here already. It was a bit interesting.
Anyway, I think they had fun. That's important. I might actually be a potential big sister who spoils her siblings. Gives 'em rides, buys 'em candy, and, most importantly, makes them feel cool. This is a totally new thing to me. Generally I'm the mean spit-fire sister who beats every-one up. Honestly, I haven't really beat anyone up for years. Heck, Joe gets upset if I sit on him for five seconds now. I can't remember the last time I beat Meg up. I used to sit on her for hours. But I've still managed to retain the reputation. Go figure.
Maybe it's a part of this growing up junk that you don't even notice until it happens.

Monday, June 21, 2004

Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.

We don't all box. But just think about it.

Saturday, June 19, 2004

I was driving back here after a day of work. Big aqua van. Windows down. Barefeet. I occasionally say what the heck and get rebellious. Whoever made it illegal to drive with barefeet but allows heels was an idiot.
Anyway, I also happened to be listening to the local semipop station. Suddenly this song came one. I don't know who sings it, and I don't know what it's called, but the chorus goes,
They say the heart of rock 'n roll is in Cleveland/
and from what I've seen I believe 'em/
My parents listened to it when I was a kid. Those songs just hit me somewhere. I love 'em. All the old hits I grew up on. And I'm not quite sure why. Maybe it stirs a sense of security, but when I hear them I don't think "I feel like a little kid again". I just grin and think to myself "what a great song".

Friday, June 18, 2004

And carefree Kristen is back. Bring it on baby!

Monday, June 14, 2004

This mind is currently overworked, over-stressed, and over-tired. It may or may not return shortly.

Friday, June 11, 2004

I challenge you to do something different today. If you never put salsa on you k.d. try it. If you haven't gotten the courage to wear those tie-dyed pants in the back of you closet anywhere, do it today. Go hiking, ride your bike somewhere. Learn how to make quality cheesecake. If you never go to the library, I pity you. Do it. If you only ever go to the library to get movies, I pity you even more. Read something besides your seventeen magazine. Check out the local thrift store. Go jogging in the rain (don't wear a white shirt). Do your hair different. Go rock climbing (be safe). Look at your city's tourist attractions. Write an old friend a letter. Call a new friend. Try doing the splits or holding you breath for a minute (I once made two). Play ring and run (but leave something nice on the doorstep). Start a club. Plan a trip. Write a poem. Pretend for a minute that you don't have any reputation to protect.
And if you don't like my ideas, think of your own.

Wednesday, June 09, 2004

I'm currently wrapping up a research report on the Chinese boxer rebellion. If you don't know much about it I won't think any less of you. I didn't either until a month ago. It was just a glitch in history that had always intrigued me, but not enough so that I actually bothered learning much about it. It's also difficult to find material on the subject. Just so we're on similar wave lengths, the rebellion was basically Chinese civilians wrapped up in mysticism who fell in hate with foreigners and their religion (Christianity). They built up a society to rid the country of them (China had been closed for so long). The empress supported them (the Boxers) in a round about way. At the great end they trapped foreigners (many missionaries) in cities and attacked. Lasted a couple months before the countries the foreigners came from rescued them. There's your history lesson for today. Now I'll get to the essence of my post.
What would I do if I was Chinese back then? Maybe I would be convert fighting to protect myself and my missionaries. Maybe I would just be a peasant trying to stay out of the way. Or, maybe, I would be part of the society. A red lantern girl. Able to float on air and start a fire by waving a fan.
Probably depends largely on the circumstances. And that's scary. If I were born at any time in history how much would it change who I am? This is even scarier, I can identify with the Boxers. If I use honesty and my vivid imagination I can seriously imagine myself fighting with them. I can play this game throughout history. Here's me laughing at Noah and his crazy plans. I can see myself giving thumbs down to gladiators in ancient Rome. I can picture myself jeering at bloody Mary's burnings. Look, there I am hitting my black servant in colonial America. And, maybe worst of all, I can understand the Hitler youth. If I lived back there back then I likely would've worshipped Hitler with the rest of them. Believed in his cause. Been caught up in the power and everything. It makes me cringe. (Parallel journeys and red scarf girl. Recommended reads)
Of course, I can also place myself on the good end throughout history. Basically the opposite of everything listed above. Although quite often I have to make the circumstances different. There's obviously no way I can find out who I'd be. I just hope that's I'd make the right decisions wherever I am. And that I'm making the right decisions now. It all comes down to how much you're born with and how much you grow with.
History teaches you a lot more then history.

Monday, June 07, 2004

I'm jealous of people who can raise an eyebrow. It's something spunky. You can raise an eyebrow in distrust, invitation, dare...So much can be said through one eyebrow. Heroines in movies and books are constantly arching their delicate eyebrows, one at a time, of course. I've been practicing. But so far it's pretty pathetic. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to say what I mean.
Now, on the subject of whistling those piercing whistles where you stick you fingers in you mouth...

Sunday, June 06, 2004

Sixty years ago today the allies landed on Juno beach. Thanks to our boys who risked their lives to end fascist rule, to free countries, and most of all, to keep my nation whole.
And to those who actually lost their lives. You couldn't have given more.
I don't champion politics. I don't appreciate the amount of rule forced on us. I really don't like governments who go to war under false pretenses or petty concerns.

"If only the King and President could be here to witness the horror their quarrels have caused."
-A Canadian woman (not a completely accurate quote, sorry)

Still, I am completely thankful to those who faced the dirty work in WWII. I hope the citizens of our country today have the same courage they did. And Judgment good enough to know when to use it.
And I pray to God that he help us.

Saturday, June 05, 2004

Yesterday I heard a sprinkler. I think I was standing on a board ten feet above pavement trying to hang soffit. But it gave me reason to stop for a few seconds. Every-one knows the sound of the sprinkler, and man, it sounds like summer. It's probably been years since I ran through a sprinkler (we don't water our lawn) but yeah, summer's here.
Now, let's not mention that today's soccer game was cancelled because of rain.
Yesterday I was also walking down the lane. Not to play with friends or have a picnic in the pasture, just to get to the shop and leave for work. But walking past the "berry tree" reminded me of all the hours I spent climbing it, playing under it, and stuffing my mouth full of berries. Heck, we still have a mailbox under there that's survived for years, and it's been almost as long since it's been used. It's like I was almost back there for a few secs. Almost, but I had to get to work.
Not to mention that the saskatoons are still small and green and hard.
I love summer. Favorite season. I just wish I could have back a few summer vacations. Or extend them for a few more years. Long days with not much to do but read and play with friends.
What a life!